Predictions that didn't Pan Out

1.“The horse is here to stay but the automobile is only a novelty.” (1903). The President of the Michigan Savings Bank.

2. “Remote shopping, while entirely feasible, will flop.” (1968). Time Magazine.

3. “Television won't last because people will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night.” (1946). Darryl Zanuck.

4. “Who the h*** wants to hear actors talk?” H. M. Warner of the Warner Brothers' movie studio.

5. “This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication.” William Orton, Western Union president.

6. “Before man reaches the moon your mail will be delivered within hours from New York to Australia by guided missile. We stand on the threshold of rocket mail.” Postmaster General Arthur Summerfield.

7. “It will be gone by June.” (1955). Variety Magazine predicted the quick demise of rock and roll.

8. “There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be obtainable. It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will.” (1932). Albert Einstein.

9. “Movies are a fad. Audiences want to see live actors on stage.” Charlie Chaplin.

10. “I think there is a market for maybe five computers.” (1943). Thomas Watson, IBM chairman.

11. “Reagan doesn't have that presidential look.” (1964). A United Artists executive explained why he rejected Ronald Reagan as the lead in a film.

12. “Rail travel at high speeds is impossible because passengers, unable to breathe, would die of asphyxia.” (1830). Dr. Dionysius Lardner.

13. “Space travel is bunk.” (1957). Stated by the astronomer Sir Harold Spencer Jones just two weeks before the Russians sent Sputnik into orbit.

14. “We don't like the sound and guitar music is on the way out.” (1962). The Decca Recording Company explaining why it saw no future for the Beatles.

15. “When the Paris Exhibition closes, electric light will close with it and no more will be heard of it.” (1878). Erasmus Wilson.

16. “A rocket will never be able to leave Earth's atmosphere.” (1920). New York Times.

17. “Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau.” (1929). Economics professor Irving Fisher. This was stated just before the Great Depression began.

18.“If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor one.” (1954). W. C. Heuper, National Cancer Institute.

19. “There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.” (1977). Ken Olson.

20.“X-rays will prove to be a hoax.” (1883). Lord Kelvin.

*** Let's not be too critical of the folks who made such wrong predictions. Remember what the great baseball player and philosopher, Yogi Berra, once said: “It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future.” 

Deep (?) Thoughts

*The fact that there's a highway to Hell and only a stairway to Heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers!

*Why do cows refuse to join the police department? Because they won't go on “steak-outs.”

*This morning I saw my neighbor talking to her cat. She actually believed the cat understood her! Later, I told my dog about this episode. We had a good laugh together.

*I used to watch The Wizard of Oz and wonder how someone could talk if they didn't have a brain. Then I got on Social Media.

*Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay they would be “bagels.”

*I miss the good old days when you could have an opinion without offending someone!

*Things that tell the truth: small children, drunk people, and yoga pants.

*Don't be mad at lazy people. They didn't do anything.

*When I was young I hoped I'd wake up beautiful. Now I'm just happy to wake up!

*Helping one person might not change the world, but it could change the world for one person.

*I've decided to avoid everything that makes me look fat: pictures, mirrors, scales, etc.

*Tips for women: 1. Meeting a man who helps you around the house and has a good job is important. 2. Find a man who makes you laugh. 3. Meet a man who is honest and responsible. 4. Find a man who will love and spoil you. 5. Make certain these four men don't know each other!

*A guy fell into an upholstery machine. He's now fully recovered.

*Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to the course? In case he got a hole-in-one.

*Confidence is knowing you're not everyone's cup of tea but that doesn't bother you.

*Do not think of ourselves as senior citizens. Think of us as “recycled teenagers.”

*The policeman pulled me over and said, “Papers.” I replied: “Scissors! I win!” Then I drove away. Evidently, he wants a rematch; he's been chasing me for half an hour.

*It's more important that you've sat with the broken than to have stood with the great.

*Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.

*My wife said I should put manure on my strawberries. I tried it, but I'm going back to sugar and cream.

*A man's age doesn't make him grown. His priorities do.

*I was booted from the coffee club because I was wearing a tee shirt.

*I was so excited about my garden that I wet my plants.

THAT'S ALL, FOLKS!

Our God is a Loving God

** One of the tasks on my bucket list is to write a sermon., so here goes...

In 1964 I was excited to learn the fabulous Beatles would appear on the popular Ed Sullivan Show, a program Dad seldom missed. To say Dad did not LOVE the rock and roll group is an understatement. As they sang their hits and the young ladies in the audience screamed, my father bluntly told me John, Paul, George, and Ringo should be arrested. Before being deported they should be given haircuts. Having a sense of humor, whenever the “Fab Four” sang “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Dad, after plugging his ears with his fingers, screamed, “No, no, no!”

One Beatles song I particularly liked was “All You Need is Love.” Whenever Dad was out of the house I'd play that record with the volume turned up. However, when Dad was home, I was smart enough to hide that record and all my rock and roll recordings in my underwear drawer; otherwise, Dad would have taken a hammer to them!

Of course, the Beatles exaggerated; we do need more than love, but loving and being loved are essential to our well-being. Thankfully, our Lord is the essence of love. John 4:8 and 4:16 reassures us of this. God created us and this world because of His love for us, and that is why He allowed Jesus to die on the cross.

The people in earlier societies did not envision many of their mythical gods to be loving deities. Ancient Sumer, located in present-day Iraq, is considered the first civilization, going back more than five thousand years ago. The Sumerians believed in many gods, but their deities, they thought, created us not out of love, but to become their slaves.

Their male gods, we are told, had personalities much like those of mortal men, so you can imagine them lying around their heavenly abode, drinking beer, ordering pizza (with extra goat topping), and watching some form of ancient football. However, there were also goddesses; no doubt, they wanted the guys to get off their duffs and do some work.

One of the gods thought up a way to get the chores finished and still be a lazy bum. The gods came to earth, where one of them began scooping clay from a river. The others watched in amazement as the leader began to shape the clay into what would be called human beings.

Each Sumerian city had a head priest, and each city had a fabulous religious temple called a ZIGGURAT. Our God, the true God, speaks directly to each of us, especially through prayer. The Sumerian gods, however, spoke only to the priests, so regularly the head priest in each city would gather the most wonderful foods to take with him into the temple as an offering to the gods while he received orders from those on high.

Today we have several remaining statues of Sumerian priests. It's interesting to note that each one is more than slightly overweight. I guess we know who ate the goodies.

The priests then gave each citizen his or her working orders. Maybe you didn't want to dig a canal in the blistering desert, but you did it, nonetheless. Slaves who did not cooperate would be destroyed by their angry gods. They could drown, have a tree fall on them, or be bitten by a poisonous snake. Therefore, you did your work out of fear.

Our mighty God has rules for us, and He has consequences for those of us who choose not to obey. Yet, unlike most of the gods of ancient Sumer, Egypt, Greece, and the Roman Empire (before it turned to Christianity), the essence of our Lord is LOVE.

We are commanded to love the Lord, and He commands us to love one another. Loving others is comparatively easy when the others are much like ourselves, but God orders us to love all his children -male and female- black and white- liberal and conservative. This is difficult for many of us, but we are even to love Michigan fans, regardless of how delusional they are.

Therefore, all folks should be welcome in this church because it is the house of the Lord, and our Creator loves each and every one of us more than we can comprehend.

By the way, Dad never accepted the Beatles, but he did sort of come around with another rocker, Elvis Presley. A year or two before he died, Dad said, “You know that Elvis guy you like so much? Well, I've been thinking; if I don't have to hear him or see him, I guess he is okay.”

Fortunately, our God always wants to see and hear from you. As an old spiritual song says, “Take it to the Lord in Prayer,” for our God is a loving and caring God. More than anything else, these attributes set the Lord apart from the mythical gods of ancient times. 

Interesting Phrases

Interesting Phrases

• HE'S ABOUT AS USEFUL AS A STEERING WHEEL ON A MULE: Describing a lazy person.

• HE'S DUMBER THAN A COAL BUCKET: A foolish person.

• AS YOU MAKE YOUR BED, SO YOU MUST LIE UPON IT: You are responsible for your own actions and must deal with the consequences.

• SHE IS A PLASTER SAINT: She's a liar or a fake.

• A LEOPARD CANNOT CHANGE ITS SPOTS: A person cannot change his basic nature.

• COULDN'T POUR WATER OUT OF A BOOT WITH INSTRUCTIONS ON THE HEEL: Describing a stupid person.

• WHEN PIGS FLY: You say something will not or cannot happen.

• HIS NICKERS ARE IN A KNOT: He's angry.

• ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS: A person's character is better shown by the things he does instead of what he says.

• LET SOMEONE OFF THE HOOK: To allow a guilty person to escape punishment.

• HE'S ALWAYS TRYING TO BE THE SMARTEST PERSON IN THE ROOM: He's a show-off.

• CAT GOT YOUR TONGUE? Asking why someone remains silent.

• GIVING SOMEONE THE COLD SHOULDER: Ignoring someone.

• DON'T CRY OVER SPILT MILK: Don't worry about events from the past that cannot be changed.

• SEEING EYE TO EYE: Two or more people in agreement.

• NOT THE BRIGHTEST BULB IN THE BOX: Describing a stupid person.

• SHE IS A WET BLANKET: She is boring.

• IT'S SO DRY THE TREES ARE BRIBING THE DOGS: Describing a long-running drought.

• COSTS AN ARM AND A LEG: Something that is very expensive.

• BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER: People with things in common tend to form friendships.

• BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN-DEEP: A person's character is more important (or should be) than one's looks.

• YOU ARE BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE: You are doing something in a way that will not work or believing something that is not true.

• CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME: Help your own family members and those people in your community before helping others.

My favorite- BUTTER MY BEHIND AND CALL ME A BISCUIT: To be surprised that something has happened.